PASSION AND DEATH
An allegorical tale
By Vince Giuliano
Revised
Farah, steely Queen of the
When Belle became a comely young woman, the
village blacksmith Nadir asked Farah for Belle's
hand. Farah
said she would go along, but only if Nadir agreed to one condition. Nadir must take the basket with the vipers,
and swear to feed and care for these snakes without limit on time. It seemed like a small price to Nadir, so he
said "fine." So Nadir took the
basket of vipers, and he kept it in a small cage beneath his and his wife's
house. He suspected that the snakes were
part of keeping Belle docile, and thought that the snakes therefore probably
served him.
Above all, Nadir yearned for the ultimate in
passion, for total ecstasy that could come to him only through losing himself
in total sexual immersion. He wished for
this more than anything. He often tried
to find this ecstasy through union with his wife. But somehow it seemed always to escape him at
the last minute. He often would tell his
wife Belle he wanted to die in her embrace, in the reverie that follows sexual
completion.
Nadir did not realize that one of the vipers in
the basket which Farah had given him was the key to
realizing the passion he so longed for.
But there was something else too.
What was known to no-one, not Nadir,or Belle,
or even Farah, is that when Farah
stole Belle's vitality and truthfulness, the goddess Khali
took a special interest in Belle, taking her into her service. Khali had enlisted
Belle in the prostitutes of the sacred and profane.
Khali had laid upon Belle a
blessing and a curse
-- and that is that any man who completely joined with her
sexually and emotionally would, by that very act, be transported to
heaven. Directly. Without passing go, so to speak. Of course,
Nadir was protected by the numbness of lack of feeling in Belle, so for a long
time they lived their ordinary lives.
Belle just getting by, without feeling much or thinking of much, Nadir
pounding hot iron by day, but by night being unable to find the heat of passion
he yearned for.
But this is all in the line of background.
Our story starts when Belle was a seller of
vegetables in the town marketplace in the square where the beggars gather, many
years after her marriage. A wise male witch,
Mohab, a man black of skin and good of heart, sells
bread in the stall next to Belle's. Mohab likes Belle and sees the numbness and lack of joy in
her. Mohab
invites Belle and her husband Nadir to a cave where members of his secret witch-coven
meet to dance rituals of truthfulness and aliveness by the light of magic fires
through the night. Belle and Nadir go
that night and participate in the dancing rituals. They dance and dance in a frenzy. And as they dance, surrounded by the magic of
the black witches, something begins to seep back into Belle -- the lively and
truthful part of her becomes restored to her from the viper.
So also is Nadir's spirit enlivened by the magic
dancing, and that night Belle and Nadir make passionate love -- that which
Nadir has most craved all his life is now realized. After that they go to sleep, and, according
to the powers of Khali invested in Belle, Nadir's
soul is transported to heaven while he sleeps.
Well, so much for Nadir. Let's not worry too much about him. After all, there were all of Khali's sacred prostitutes up in heaven to take care of
him.
Grieving her dead husband but even more
cherishing her newly found aliveness, Belle is at first a new person to her
mother, sister, and others. Her radiance
enlivens all those around her. However
Belle is still under Farah's spell, which gradually
reasserted itself. Her truthfulness and
aliveness drains back into the viper, and in a few days she grows tight and
closed again. Once again, the viper re-possesses
those important parts of Belle's spirit.
Unconscious of this, Belle continues to feed the snakes, though she as
always is uncomfortable in their presence.
Traveling in the country one day by carriage to
visit her mother, Belle has to cross a ravine which is flooded due to a sudden
storm. In the midst of crossing the
water her horses bolt. Belle is thrown
into the cold muddy water and her carriage upset. Clymus, a hermit and Shaman who lives nearby,
sees this happen, and rescues Belle from the water. He takes her to his cave to dry and
rest. There they talk long of many
things.
Looking into Belle's soul, Clymus sees the
emptiness of her spirit, that she has trouble simply speaking the truth, and
that her joy is somehow absent. As their
friendship deepens, Belle tells Clymus of the basket of vipers that is under
her house. Wise in the shamanistic ways
of the natural order, Clymus tells Belle to bring the cage of snakes to him,
which she does the next day.
Clymus looks into the eyes of the vipers, and
sees there, sparkling deeply, Belle's aliveness and truthfulness and Jonquil's
restraint and judgment. He then speaks
silently to the two vipers in the language of snakes, and starts to bargain
with them. He will set them free in the wilderness,
if they will agree to release Belle's truth and aliveness and Jonquil's
restraint and judgment. The vipers
happily consent, and Clymus lets the two snakes go on a remote mountain
ledge. As they go, they leave behind two
pomegranate seeds, one shaped as a heart, the other shaped as a star.
Clymus instructs Belle to eat the pomegranate
seed shaped as heart, and to deliver the other seed to Jonquil and
have her eat it. As Belle eats the
heart-shaped seed, a tremendous wave of freedom and lovingness washes over her. Awash in euphoria, gratitude and seeing the
truths and beauty of life fully for the first time, Belle wants nothing more
than to make love with Clymus. She still
knows nothing of the curse of Khali that is upon
her. But before the snakes had slithered
away they had hissed the secret to Clymus, warning him that Belle was in Khali's service and that he could forsake his life by
making love to her. But Clymus has lived
many lives and seen many things, and knows death will soon retrieve him by one
means or the other. So he chooses to go
directly to heaven by making love with Belle.
They perform the sacred act of love.
It is transcendent in its beauty.
The next morning Clymus is dead too, his soul transported to heaven.
Alive and inspired though grieved of Clymus, a
consciousness begins to arise in Belle of the power of the goddess within
her. She seeks her sister Jonquil, and
gives her the star-shaped pomegranate seed to eat. As her sister does that, they embrace deeply,
seeing for the first time reflected in each other the full beauty of their
sisterhood. They encounter Farah, who sees that they have recovered what she had
stolen from them and entrusted to the snakes.
But she can do nothing to further contain her daughters.
Jonquil has a friend, Herodat,
once a fast man with women, a trainer of race horses and successful
gambler. But Herodat
had been caught cheating in sex for the final time by his last wife, and caught
cheating in money for the last time by the rich merchants who had trusted
him. Now disgraced, poor, and three-times
divorced, his family and possessions are gone.
He is haunted most by the desolation of his own soul. He alone spits on himself, for others have
forgotten him. Now, aging, he wants only
to regain honor in the eyes of the gods, to make right his life.
Knowing of some of the magic of spirit that is
now in Belle, Jonquil introduces Belle to Herodat, to
see if she can balm the hurt in the heart of this
wounded man. Belle consents. She finds Herodat
strange in his woundedness, even repulsive, but she
knows she had the power to make him whole.
She knows too this can only be through abandonment in love and complete
sex with him. But by now Belle is beginning
to realize that embracing this man in absolute sexual love would destroy him
too. He would be whole, but then would
pass on to heaven. She does not want
another man to die in her embrace. She
prays to the Great Goddess to free herself of the burden of the curse that Khali had laid upon her, to
relieve her of the special power to transport men to heaven.
Belle goes down to the river Nepenthe that flows
near her house, draws a magic circle around herself by the light of the full
moon, and begs for release. Khali appears before her and Belle cries "Please
release me, let me be but a mortal, let me love without my lover having to
die. Let me make full love to Herodat without your taking him."
Khali responds "I cannot
do that. You are in my service as a
most-sacred prostitute, a transporter to the higher domain. You have served me twice; now you ask
release. Of course you can make love
with him but hold yourself back, and he will be fine. Realize though that for you absolute ecstasy
and death are bound together as one. Only
by your complete lovingness and his complete surrender in your embrace can Herodat find what he wants.
Then he must die. You can serve Herodat by giving him this transportation. That is all there is for you to do with
him. He is not suitable to be your
husband."
Belle asks "Must I serve you all my
days?" Khali
responds "Because
you have served me well, I will release you after you perform a third service
on my behalf. Make passionate love to Herodat; he shall then die; through you I shall give him
the deliverance he wants and requires.
Then if you wish I shall come to you once more, and you can choose to be
released from my service if you wish."
That night, Belle holds Herodat
in a tender embrace, and asks him again to say what his ultimate wish is. He says "It is very simple - to die
clean, in true love in the arms of one I love and who loves me, in the release
of making love in absolute passion to someone who is pure, who can cleanse
me. Simply put I want to be fucked to
the point where I have no more thoughts, no mind, fucked to death by an angel
of light." Then, moving ever so
slowly, they begin to make love, deeply and passionately. After finishing the act a first time, Herodat begins to cry with deep sobs. Then they make love again, and again he cries
-- and laughs too. Only in the third
bout is the experience complete and perfect, and Herodat
falls into a deep sleep from which he does not awake.
Khali descends and bears Herodat's soul up to heaven. In seeing this, Belle sees the compassionate
side of Khali, and comprehends the sacred nature of
the service she has provided.
Belle radiates life and warmth to those she
encounters at her vegetable stall after that.
The sick and demented who experience her touch
become well; good fortune falls upon those whom she beams upon. Even the ice in her mother's heart begins to
melt. Her sister marries a kind and rich
merchant, and bears two wonderful daughters of her own. But as the weeks and months pass, Belle becomes
lonely; she wants a mate, a husband, a partner to share her bed and life
with. So she goes back to the banks of
the Nepenthe river in the full moon at
The goddess appears before her and Belle says
"Khali, great goddess of love and death, I beg
you to release me now from your service as you promised. I am lonesome. I don't want to be a transporter of strangers
any more, a prostitute in your sacred service. I want a husband; I want to be
an ordinary human. I want an ordinary
life. I have served you thrice as you
asked. Now release me."
Khali says "I will do
that if you wish, but first you must understand the choice. If I were to release you, you would retain
your truthfulness and your aliveness that you retrieved from the serpents, but
you would loose the edge of your sexual passion, that edge I have given you
that provides transportation to heaven.
You would become an ordinary human lover, with human passion and
compassion, but without ability to experience or convey the depth of ecstasy
that transports. And I would have to
take away all your memories of the gods, your memories of the magic you have
known, your memories of the depths of passion you have experienced. That would be the price. Now, is becoming an ordinary human still your
choice?"
Belle hesitates, and responds
"Yes." With that word Khali vanishes, as does Belle's priestess power and
memories. Belle walks home from the
river, wondering why in heaven's name she had gone there so late at night. A few months later Belle meets a kind and
handsome man, who she marries after an appropriate courtship. As the years pass she is sometimes happy and
sometimes sad, but always radiant and giving to those around her. She grows closer to her mother and sister,
but never compromising in her thirst for a full life. She dies an ordinary death at the age of 73,
leaving a loving family and loving friends behind.
In heaven, her memory fully restored,
the spirit that was Belle meets Khali. What she has
to say is "Khali, of all things in my life,
serving you was the most profound. I beg
you, in my next reincarnation allow me to serve you
again." Khali
smiles in consent, and thus it is so.
And thus another story like this one starts again, and then again
another such story, and then another.
Thus turns the great wheel of life, cycles of passion and death.
THE END
Author's comment: I married one once and she nearly killed me.
Copyright 2008 by Vincent E. Giuliano, all rights reserved